So...it turns out my original "review" of Advance Wars: Dual Strike I posted a while ago has turned up on some sort of blog-search engine called "boxxet". Or something. If anything, this aforementioned blasphemous site may or may not completely shatter my dreams (and supreme mission) of having no one -- absolutely no one -- ever read this blog...hence the subtitle, "A Blog That No One Will Read or Care About". By having someone actually read what I write means more work for me and an additional name change to "A Blog That Only A Couple People Read, But Ultimately No One Cares About."Hmm...that honestly has a nice ring to it! Nope! Nevermind I said that!
In any case, in honor of the first DS Advance Wars installment, I guess I'll write about the second, Days of Ruin (but only because this "boxxet" site seems to love handheld strategy games. Or something.). Also, Will Wright apparently loves this series and since he's a dude who makes games that I don't necessarily play, it seems that the right thing to do would be to talk about Advance Wars. Which is okay. I like this series, too, Mr. Wright (and do you have any job openings in your company, by the way? Just to let you know, kissing ass is something I do very well! Watch: Says the author of GoforBroak, "Spore is a gift from heaven above, delivered from God Himself, unto the poor peoples of the earth; and it was good! Really good!" Mr. Wright, I even will give you permission to use that quote on the back of the box! Sure it may sound a little sacrilegious (or maybe not at all -- it's your call), but I'm sure this Spore game will sell millions because of it! Honest! I am not kidding! Also, I guess I should mention that I'm not too much of a psycho! Emphasis on the "too much"! Okay? OKAY?!)
Ahem. Advance Wars: Days of Ruin. Yes.
I happen to feel that the first installment on the DS was a little too arcade-y (note: I hate throwing that word around) and somewhat made the whole experience a little uneven because of it. For example, the CO powers pretty much broke the game -- get Colin and Hachi on a team, or something, and it was essentially game over. The inclusion of all the other sorts of modes (such as the Tanks mini-game) also seems to reinforce my arcade-y argument about Duel Strike. But that's okay! I loved every minute of that game and still do! Also, Jake's music was bitchin'!
But that's besides the point.
See, when Days of Ruin first was released, I was excited. Maybe even a little beyond excited. Finally, it seemed as if Intelligent Systems (the game's developer) was taking this series crazy-serious and ironing out everything that made Dual Strike a little wonky. The characters were all new and dark, the war-torn world was more realistic and dark, and the graphics were completely redone (and dark). Did I mention the game was dark? The masses love dark!
Anyway, the game itself is a hell of a lot more balanced. Those funky CO powers aren't constantly used (since you pretty much could have been wiped out in one turn when somebody engaged their power in Dual Strike), and some of the more questionable units (like the stealth fighter) have been removed. Most of the characters more or less resemble the old ones in battlefield abilities (especially Gage and his sniper traits) -- this isn't a bad thing, since the character system in the previous games worked so well. And speaking of Gage, his theme may rock even harder than Jake's! Bagpipes? With electric guitars? Yes, please!
I don't really want to talk about the plot, since people talk about plots in videogames way too much. Go read a book or something. Anna Karenina comes to mind for some reason. Don't ask me why. But the actual campaign mode here is really well done, if not almost completely identical to the campaign modes in previous games. You know how it goes: complete one mission, move onto the next, until you finally reach the Final Bad Guy (in this case, by the way, he isn't in wheel chair. So you don't have to feel bad about shooting him. Or blowing him up. Spoilers!).
That's about it, if you, the nonexistent viewer of this blog still persist in reading. Days of Ruin probably is my favorite in the series, even if it's a lightweight content-wise in comparison to other Advance Wars games. The content that's here, though, is so well-crafted and finely-honed that I simply cannot complain -- and neither should anyone else. Do you really need to play that Tanks mini-game again? Uh, no.
P.S. -- And here's to you, Boxxet! Way to ruin everything! This will probably cause me days of ruin, I might add! Hyuk-hyuk!
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